The Power of Intergenerational Relationships
Charles and I are different.
We are from different generations. He is a Baby Boomer, I am from Generation X. He is retired, I am still active in my profession. When we gather for worship, he wears His Sunday best, I tend to dress more business casual. His first wife passed away 10 years ago, and he is now remarried. I have not lost a spouse to death, and have been married to the same woman for 18 years.
Differences.
When I first met Charles, that’s what I focused on. Differences. What good could come from being around someone who is from an entirely different generation? So I shifted, and tried to see similarities: we’re both in the same profession, the same church; we both care for people, and we both live in the same part of town.
But there are people my age of whom those same things are true.
It’s when we read passages of scripture like the one below that we are reminded of what we miss if we overlook intergenerational relationships.
"For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others."
Romans 12:4-5
We miss seeing faith lived out from another perspective.
We miss the testimonies and stories of another generation
We miss out on another part of the Body of Christ.
We miss hearing the wisdom that is shared from life experience.
It’s not just what we miss out on, it’s what a lack of intergenerational relationships can lead to:
We can become biased and think all members should look just like us
We can treat those of different generations as stereotypes, flattening their values and assuming bad intent
We can become divisive in our differences
We can stop listening to others and miss the story that God is forming/and has formed in the other person’s life
If we really pause in that passage, there is a deeper challenge. Do we value those different from us? Do we value those from a different generation?
If I truly value Charles, I will do so not because of something he can do, but because of who he is. He is a member of the Body of Christ, the same Body of Christ I belong to. He is a child of God.
I looked at Charles differently. I started listening more about life experience Charles has had. I’ve heard the grief and loss that he has experienced. I’ve heard his passion for shepherding and the joy he has knowing that there are younger pastors who have that same zeal. I’ve watched him live a life of faithfulness to God. I’ve watched him ‘go to bat’ for me in a meeting that I clearly was not leading well. I can’t forget the many times at church he speaks a word of encouragement to me. Charles is one of my favorite people, and brings such joy to my life!
When my brother passed away, Charles was among those who reached out and prayed for me and my family. Just recently he wrote a card filled with scripture, love and care. When I read it, I believed it, because I knew who it was coming from. I knew the experience with which he wrote those words, and shared the scripture. It was something only one generation could tell the next.
"Tell it to your children, and let your children tell it to their children, and their children to the next generation."
Joel 1:3
I saw this type of living last Sunday. One of our millennial adults sitting with one of our older adults, they were worshiping together. It warmed my heart. But it doesn’t stop there with them. They have dinner together. They look after one another, in the spring and summer, he cuts her grass, and she helps him with his flower bed. They have gone to church activities together. They see each other as God sees them!
I see it with my children. At church, my four-year old daughter has an older adult who teaches her in children’s class. That alone is impacting her. On top of that, she also receives cards and notes in the mail from her. How blessed my daughter is to have her in her life!
Young men and women, old men and children. Let them praise the name of the Lord, for his name alone is exalted; his splendor is above the earth and the heavens. (Psalm 148:12-13)
What a joy and privilege we have in building these intentional relationships into our lives!
Questions:
Who can you intentionally invite to your table, into your circle that is from a different generation?
What ways can you intentionally pause and listen to them and hear their story?
A couple of resources to check out:
Article: Best Practices in Intergenerational Faith Formation – John Roberto
https://faithformationlearningexchange.net/uploads/5/2/4/6/5246709/best_practices_in_intergenerational_faith_formation.pdf
Book: Intergenerational Christian Formation – Holly Catherton Allen and Christine Lawton Ross
https://www.amazon.com/Intergenerational-Christian-Formation-Bringing-Community/dp/083083981X
We are from different generations. He is a Baby Boomer, I am from Generation X. He is retired, I am still active in my profession. When we gather for worship, he wears His Sunday best, I tend to dress more business casual. His first wife passed away 10 years ago, and he is now remarried. I have not lost a spouse to death, and have been married to the same woman for 18 years.
Differences.
When I first met Charles, that’s what I focused on. Differences. What good could come from being around someone who is from an entirely different generation? So I shifted, and tried to see similarities: we’re both in the same profession, the same church; we both care for people, and we both live in the same part of town.
But there are people my age of whom those same things are true.
It’s when we read passages of scripture like the one below that we are reminded of what we miss if we overlook intergenerational relationships.
"For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others."
Romans 12:4-5
We miss seeing faith lived out from another perspective.
We miss the testimonies and stories of another generation
We miss out on another part of the Body of Christ.
We miss hearing the wisdom that is shared from life experience.
It’s not just what we miss out on, it’s what a lack of intergenerational relationships can lead to:
We can become biased and think all members should look just like us
We can treat those of different generations as stereotypes, flattening their values and assuming bad intent
We can become divisive in our differences
We can stop listening to others and miss the story that God is forming/and has formed in the other person’s life
If we really pause in that passage, there is a deeper challenge. Do we value those different from us? Do we value those from a different generation?
If I truly value Charles, I will do so not because of something he can do, but because of who he is. He is a member of the Body of Christ, the same Body of Christ I belong to. He is a child of God.
I looked at Charles differently. I started listening more about life experience Charles has had. I’ve heard the grief and loss that he has experienced. I’ve heard his passion for shepherding and the joy he has knowing that there are younger pastors who have that same zeal. I’ve watched him live a life of faithfulness to God. I’ve watched him ‘go to bat’ for me in a meeting that I clearly was not leading well. I can’t forget the many times at church he speaks a word of encouragement to me. Charles is one of my favorite people, and brings such joy to my life!
When my brother passed away, Charles was among those who reached out and prayed for me and my family. Just recently he wrote a card filled with scripture, love and care. When I read it, I believed it, because I knew who it was coming from. I knew the experience with which he wrote those words, and shared the scripture. It was something only one generation could tell the next.
"Tell it to your children, and let your children tell it to their children, and their children to the next generation."
Joel 1:3
I saw this type of living last Sunday. One of our millennial adults sitting with one of our older adults, they were worshiping together. It warmed my heart. But it doesn’t stop there with them. They have dinner together. They look after one another, in the spring and summer, he cuts her grass, and she helps him with his flower bed. They have gone to church activities together. They see each other as God sees them!
I see it with my children. At church, my four-year old daughter has an older adult who teaches her in children’s class. That alone is impacting her. On top of that, she also receives cards and notes in the mail from her. How blessed my daughter is to have her in her life!
Young men and women, old men and children. Let them praise the name of the Lord, for his name alone is exalted; his splendor is above the earth and the heavens. (Psalm 148:12-13)
What a joy and privilege we have in building these intentional relationships into our lives!
Questions:
Who can you intentionally invite to your table, into your circle that is from a different generation?
What ways can you intentionally pause and listen to them and hear their story?
A couple of resources to check out:
Article: Best Practices in Intergenerational Faith Formation – John Roberto
https://faithformationlearningexchange.net/uploads/5/2/4/6/5246709/best_practices_in_intergenerational_faith_formation.pdf
Book: Intergenerational Christian Formation – Holly Catherton Allen and Christine Lawton Ross
https://www.amazon.com/Intergenerational-Christian-Formation-Bringing-Community/dp/083083981X
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